Wednesday, April 15, 2015

I am so impatient. It's how I've always been. I want something and I want it right then. Be it new toys, new job, new city, new whatever. It doesn't really matter. I want to be constantly on the go. To have a destination, a new adventure, something, ANYTHING to take up my time. That's been one of the most frustrating things in my life. I feel like now I've come to a point where God is just like, "Macy, STOP."

I'm not saying I've always gotten everything I ever asked for, or everything I've ever wanted, but I have been pretty blessed in this life. Though there's been times in my life where I just did not understand God's will. I did not understand the troubling times he was putting me through, but I look back now and in all those instances I notice that everything worked out EXACTLY like God planned. It's actually amazing to see that now.

I've been so so blessed by so many wonderful things in my life. I've got an amazing family, a wonderful husband, and I've been blessed with a job that provides for me and for my family.

But here lies my struggle. Job satisfaction. What does it even mean? Do people actually like their jobs?! I worked in Montgomery with the Department of Environmental Management for a little over a year. I was happy there. I wish I had known it then. But there I was, constantly looking for my next adventure, for my next career, for what else I could be doing. 

Then, I accepted another job in a new city. It was a short search and actually the first and only position I interviewed for down here. Really? WHY DIDN'T I LISTEN.

But you know what.. it doesn't matter. I took it for a reason, I am where I am for a reason. 

I moved down here to be with my husband, for us to start our lives together in a new town, to make new friends, to learn a little bit about living on our own (which is scary, BTW). And guess what? It's been hard. It's been a struggle.

I think I know what I'm supposed to be learning: PATIENCE. I hear ya, God.

I will wait upon the Lord. Strength will rise.

I don't know what God's plan is for my life, and I'm not supposed to. I am supposed to trust, with my whole heart, that whatever happens is God's will.

So I will wait.

I will wait, I will pray, I will TRUST. And I will praise the Lord for all my life's blessings.

And I will try to do so patiently.

Acts 1: 7-8 - He told them, "You don't get to know the time. Timing is the Father's business. What you'll get is the Holy Spirit. And when the Holy Spirit comes on you, you will be able to be my witness."

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